A Journey towards Integration
Taking a little break while I move…packing, unpacking, cleaning, a stressed and exhausted toddler, and a silverfish infestation in the kitchen have all kept me quite busy. Meanwhile, here are some “prayers” to use if you want to practice I.M.P.R.O.V.E. and/or Mindfulness skills. (This sort of thing is not really my cup of tea, but almost everyone else in group seems to enjoy them, so I’m posting them in case anyone else finds this kind of meditation helpful. Let me know if you do! Or don’t…whatever is your cup of tea.)
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and the wisdom to know the difference.
Just for today I will be happy. Just for today I will try to adjust myself to what is, and not try to adjust everything to my own desires. Just for today I will care for my body. Just for today I will exercise my soul in three ways -do a good turn and not get found out -do at least two things I don’t want to do, just for the exercise. Just for today I will try to live through this day only, not to tackle my whole life problem at once. Just for today I will have a program. Just for today I will have a quiet half-hour all by myself and relax. Just for today I will be unafraid, especially I will not be afraid to be happy, to enjoy what is beautiful, to love, and to believe that those I love, love me.
A father wanted to teach his four sons the lesson of not judging something or someone too quickly, and so he called his four sons together and said, “I have a task for you. I want you, my eldest son, to go out into our fields and take a look at the pear tree and come back and tell me what your evaluation is of its condition.”
So the eldest went out and saw the pear tree. But it was winter, and the son saw the tree on a harsh winter day and reported back and said to his father, “I see nothing of promise about the tree. It appears old, and gnarled, and has no blooms on it at all. I doubt it will survive the winter.”
Three months later the father sent the next eldest son out in the spring to evaluate the pear tree. The son came back saying, “The tree is very beautiful, with white blooms, but it seems purely ornamental, it has no fruit, nor any sign of ever bearing any. I doubt it will be of much practical use to us.”
Three months later the father sent the third from the eldest son out in the summer. The son went out to see the tree and came back reporting, “The tree seems to be growing and doing well, and it is full of leaves, and I could see some fruit, so I picked one and tasted it, but it was bitter, not fit for human consumption. I doubt it will prove of much use to us.”
Finally, three months later the father sent his youngest son out to see the tree once more. This time the tree was full of ripe, beautiful, golden and red pears. The son tried one and came back with the glowing report, “Father, we must come quickly for the harvest is upon the tree, and it is heavy laden and needs us to pick the pears for they are ripe and delicious now.”
The father called his four sons back together, and said, “You see each of you have observed the condition of a tree at a particular season of the year, but your judgment of the tree was only partial, and made too quickly based on what you saw on only the one occasion. See to it that you never judge human beings this way. Never evaluate them too quickly or on the basis of one encounter, for it is unfair and unwise. Indeed, all living things should only be evaluated over the course of time and after repeated careful inspection, for who knows but the ugliest and most unproductive of living things might some day turn into the most beautiful and fruitful.”
An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life. “A fight is going on inside me,” he said to the boy.
“It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil — he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.” He continued, “The other is good — he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you — and inside every other person, too.”
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf will win?”
The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”
—thanks to S. for bringing this to group, and I hope you read this some day
“Energy flows where thought goes.” —thanks to Ruth Ann
Other resources: DBT Scriptural Correlations